Selected articles from my column, Act As If, at NowCasting.com



My So-Called Career

I carry a briefcase. I’m dressed in a severe, all-business power suit. The skirt is a conservative, yet attractive length. The heels of my shoes are just high enough to be painful. I approach the desk and check my watch. I’m agitated. An underling is late. I sit at the desk and, with manicured nails, type something on the keyboard—something important. I’m the boss.

A giant, hollowed-out basketball completely covers my head.

 
Order Vs. Chaos
I’m one of those people you might call “anal.” It’s an unattractive term for an orderly person. I’m not obsessive-compulsive to the point of exhibiting the so-named disorder, but…
 
The Noun Problem
Last night I told my husband about yesterday’s visit to the proctologist. I related my discussion with the doctor, covering such topics as nutrition and exercise. I described how the doctor poked needles into my hands, legs, and ear...